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When life hits you upside the head!

Debie Monax - Author * Speaker Professional photos outside back before Quarantine became a Thing
Debie Monax – Author * Speaker

Professional photos outside back before Quarantine became a Thing

Where were you when you first heard about Coronavirus?

I heard about it on the radio and I just thought it was some strange thing that was happening in China which seemed so far away.

Then, they sent my child home from school the week before spring break with some strange emails about kids getting educated online temporarily. When my 16 year old adjusted from being in a live classroom to logging into google classroom, she and her friends became diligent about schoolwork in an entirely new way. I was impressed with her fortitude, grace and diligence.

Then gradually, my activities began getting cancelled., even those at church. As I deleted events on my calendar and had my whole family home with me, I read more articles and watched a tiny bit of television about the governor of Colorado’s shutdown orders.

I like many people, thought it was an overreaction and it seemed strange to me.

Then I logged into tastytrade.com which has some interesting investing shows that I like to listen to and I think I was listening live with the show on when the US Stock Market lost value and volatility spiked to 80% in one day. I don’t know if it was hearing the shows live comments or if it was checking my investing portfolio I got out of my denial for good.

This was real and it had my attention. I’m sure each of you have a similar story of your own. And now, on April 16th, most people are feeling boredom and the repetition of day after day being the same as the last. Do you forget what day of the week it is? It happens to me all the time. Thankfully, I can look at my calendar.

This time is challenging all of us to define what is important and what we are going to focus on.

Here are some thoughts:

  • Health – I spend my time planning meals for my family and I to eat, my husband leaves the house and manages the grocery shopping.
  • Exercise – This is harder than normal, because I never leave the house. I walk my dog in the neighborhood with my mask. Being outside is keeping me sane. Ideas for things I haven’t done yet are, 1)Yoga by Adrien or 2) Pulling out my old P90X dvd’s and weights.
  • Personal development – I enjoy participating in zoom meetings with other people, learning new things and networking.
  • Writing – I’m doing a lot of this now because it’s my happy place. I journal and I write and mail letters to my friends and family.
  • Reading – I spend time with a good book because I can take myself to the place and events there that I can read about.

Zoom events, including Happy Hour!

Comment below and tell me how you are and what you are doing for self care at this point in time. Be Well my friends!

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Snowy February

What the Weatherchannel.com is telling Coloradans in February 2020

When February 1 comes around, I get happy.

Why would you get happy in Colorado at the start of a Winter month on the calendar?

Easy, my birthday is on February 7, my daughter’s birthday is on February 23 (this year she’ll be Sweet Sixteen!). I’m glad to say my husband drove through over a half foot of the fluffy fat flakes that were falling on 2/7/2020 this year to have my birthday dinner at Outback Steakhouse which was a great time!

But that’s not all, it is Valentine’s Day on February 14th (as you know). I took advantage of the 50% off candy sales on February 17th!

And my mother in law’s birthday is February 10th (she lives in California, so there’s no competition or conflict 🙂 ).

February 2020 is looking like it is competing to beat March as the snowiest month in Denver like it did last year.

Monthly & Annual Snowfall https://www.weather.gov/bou/seasonalsnowfall
(1882-2020)

So how do you cope when you live in Colorado?

The February cumulative total as of February 19th,2020 is 46.8 inches.

  1. Wear layers to keep you warm.
  2. Drink hot beverages (tea or coffee)
  3. Throw an extra blanket over you in bed or when watching tv on the couch.
  4. Marvel when you think about your amazing furnace which will be 19 years old this year.

Stay warm and motivated!
Watch for the launch of my membership site and MSAwareness Month in March!

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Autumn Transitions

It’s the time of year when the world is struggling to transition to Winter. Here in Denver, the leaves are dead but attached to their branches in varying states of color changes, but caught by surprise in the First Freeze, before they were ready.

A part of me still wants to go barefoot as if it’s the summer and is caught off guard by how cool the mornings are. In the weeks before Halloween and changing clocks, which will shorten our days and move us towards darkness.

It is Invisible Disabilities Week once more. This is a time of awareness and connection for the people affected by illness and disability who are living full lives, but outside the norms of full-time work or school and yet, yearning for fulfillment, creativity and focus on meaningful life purposes. They know they are unique and here for a specific role and purpose, but they are no longer willing to bump their head against the brick wall of the struggle for a ‘normal’ life any more.

It is near when the Northern Hemisphere will curl up into the darkness of Winter. But Spiritual Beings want to work quietly on fulfilling their family lives and pursuing important spiritual work and creative passions. It is a good time to seek healing and moving towards Joy and Purpose.

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Do We Remember 9/11 Now?

Family Time

Each of us probably has a memory which they can’t forget of where they were on 9/11/01 when terrorist controlled plans crashed into the World Trade Center and into a field in route to the Pentagon killing over 3,000 innocent people. I vividly remember watching the first tower come down during live coverage from a tv in my doctor’s office. I was shocked as the live coverage anchors and much of America.

Eighteen years later, I’m not sure how much healing has taken place across America from the horror of that moment. But I can honestly say now, Nineteen years after I received my MS diagnosis. I now consider my MS a gift and I have definitely healed. I have gotten crystal clear on what I consider to be most important in my life and I prioritize God, family, relationships, and helping others because I am so blessed.

I wrote about my feelings then in Chapter 3 of Woman Plans, God Laughs. For awhile everyone treated each other with kindness and gratefulness for each other and for being alive. Then people got suspicious and fearful, particularly of Muslims and the religion. I won’t wade into the great recession in 2008 or any Presidential Elections as I don’t want people who read this to argue with each other, lol.

I hope you are doing well also on your journey. I’d love to hear from you below. Peace.

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Early Delivery

I talk in my book about the time I was pregnant with my first child and I was unexpectedly diagnosed with HELLP Syndrome and Severe Eclampsia at 32 weeks. A full-term pregnancy is normally 40 weeks.

I had severe pain in my ribs which made me nauseous. I was in my 3rd trimester, well past the normal period where pregnancy would make a woman nauseous.

https://www.thecut.com/2019/08/what-is-the-human-placenta-project.html?fbclid=IwAR2kx3coC4gHBRfoMuDwVS1Z6Ww-i78spFI8a02o7N6xo6MpgoENN7UolRI

After seeing the doctor on-call in the hospital where I was admitted, I was sent back home. After waking up in pain later that night, I knew they hadn’t found the cause of my discomfort.

I somehow girded myself and withstood the pain with the goal of being on the doctor’s doorstep Monday morning until they figured out what was going on!

It was eerie when I got to the doctor’s office. It was quiet and the doctors weren’t in yet. After I explained my symptoms the nurse in the office (who I had met with previously) and after she had examined me, she made the brusque assessment that I needed to head back to the hospital.

Once there, blood tests were performed (apparently the right tests this time around). A specialist called a perinatologist who I had never met came over to me and my husband. He familarly sat on the edge of my bed and looked me in the eyes. He stated, “You have a very serious condition called HELLP Syndrome and you need to deliver….today”

I was completely unprepared for this possible outcome of our trip to the hospital. Not to mention, I hadn’t brought a packed bag for an overnight stay. As the day unfolded, we also realized we hadn’t picked out a boy’s name for the baby as we couldn’t agree upon it. Surprisingly, we had agreed on the name of Sierra if we were to have a girl.

I had also not come up with a birth plan for delivery, which as events unfolded, became irrelevant. My platelets were dangerously low which made an epidural it a risky option. I was not going to drug my premature child with some of the pain options offered and so it was decided for me that I would be planning a natural delivery. It turned out my genes from my mother were a blessing for me as she had always had fast labors and natural deliveries.

For more information on what HELLP Syndrome is and and what the doctors have learned about it since the birth of my daughter 15 years ago. At 2 pounds 13.8 ounces she had been growth restricted during my pregnancy (See IUGR discussed in article above)

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How the Unexpected Saved My Life

The most difficult loss in my life was the moment during my second pregnancy when the doctor said, “I’m not finding a heart beat” and I started to understand that I had lost my 2nd child at 18 weeks.

I gave myself a long mourning period where I did self-care and wrote a letter to my missing child. This process takes a long time. Take whatever time you need, but still notice what is making you happy. For me, I had one child and my job as her mom, was to take her to and from pre-school each day. I made that be my unique purpose. I took intentional action to be the best mom to her each day. I made sure we left with plenty of time to be early to school. I appreciated my daughter and who she was each day. She liked to pick dandelions and give them to me along the way. I carefully held on to the dandelions she handed to me until I got home after I dropped her off. When I did get home I filled a little glass with water and put the flowers in the water. My unique purpose was being the best mom I could be to my little girl. I did this day by day and started to feel good again and started to feel lesser and lesser amounts of pain. I still honored my losses. My husband and I worked well together this way. If there were things to get done and it was an off day for me, he picked up the ball of whatever the responsibility was. This was how I got through my days.

Everyone has a unique purpose. Only you know what yours is. I’m also spiritual and have faith in God. I believe God has a unique plan for each of us and He loves us. Working on exploring your unique purpose can lead us to clues about what God’s plan for us is. I try to live God’s will for me in my life each day and this is how I start.

Please comment and tell me what God’s will for you looks like each day! God Bless You!

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SNOWMAGGEDON!

Three Days of No School

I was behind on updating my blog post, so God gave me a snowstorm to shut my internet down! Plus, the power in Sierra’s school was out for the third day! Good thing I can write my blog post using paper and pen!!

Most days I am struggling to get to all of my necessary tasks and my time is so busy. Today I have my chili dinner cooking on low on the stove while I write this. Sometimes the Universe is clear and tells us to slow down and enjoy our at home blessings.

Announcements:

Hear my interview by Cynthia Ellis on LadiesChitChatClub podcast called There is More starting Friday March 15, 2019.

In this interview you will hear how the very things that went wrong for me brought me to a closer relationship to God and moved me forward to my path as an author and writer instead of being a CPA.

I have tended to struggle with implementing the concept of living a Christ like life and to listen and try to do God’s will. From everything I write about in my book Woman Plans, God Laughs: My Story of Love, Loss, and Learning to Live Life with Faith  I finally feel clear on this concept in my life. I believe God’s will for me is to plan, organize and take care of my family and to build my writing business. Look forward to more articles from me in various forums. I will also be working with individuals that want my help with online courses and group and individual coaching.

I’m also looking forward to the completion of my audio book which is expected by April. My book is in the final stages of being finalized. Look for it on amazon.com/author/debiemonax by April.

Have a wonderful and joyful Spring Break!

Debie Monax

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The New Year, a New Way

I had an epiphany in this season of The Epiphany today at my WW Meeting. This is the quote they showed us:

“She who has a why can bear any how” by Riedrich Nietzsche.

This is something my personality doesn’t really do. The boredom and repetitiveness of focusing on why I want my goals just doesn’t attract me. But I understood it differently today. If my why is strong enough, I will be pulled toward the how and toward my goals!

I have spent my whole life thinking if I can be as perfect as possible (even though nobody is perfect) I can then control what happens to me. If you read my book Woman Plans, God Laughs… you’ll know that I thought I controlled my life in every way until I got a dual diagnosis of two heart-breaking diseases, multiple sclerosis and endometriosis. Both made me have a life where I couldn’t control many of the things I thought I cared about, the most painful one over the years, being that I couldn’t have a career and make a lot of $ and all that comes with that. It has already been 12 years since I’ve worked.

My book was launched coming up on a  year ago on January 24th. Having my story and my book be out in the world has been an amazing experience. But I don’t know how to be a perfect at something I’ve never done so I haven’t achieved many of my desires and goals in this arena yet.

If I followed living the above quote in a systematic way and with intention, it would lead me to look at the vision of my life.  What I want to have and why. What it would look like to have healthy eating, for example, and how that would make me feel? Then the how is not to be a perfect eater, it is simply to make small choices daily because I want the vision of a healthy life, I want the way it would feel to have more energy and more activity and happiness in my life!

I always think the how of accomplishing a goal is the most important thing. But  this life we’re living is a marathon not a sprint and we are faced with infinitesimal decisions to make on a minute by minute basis. Those small decisions are ultimately what move us forward to where  we find ourself right now. The long-term vision is exactly what we need to end up where we want to be!

I’m excited to form a new habit this year and I’m keeping it simple. I’ve been in WW since May, but I’ve yet to complete the Success Story Journal they gave me. In it there is space to write my Why and my Goals. Then since I’m at a meeting once a week, there are blanks to keep track of and write down what worked and what didn’t that week. And I can modify and adjust my why as I go.

I’m looking forward to completing my success story day by day and looking back on my journey a year from now. I’ll let you know what I learn.

Happy New Year!

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Being Grateful for the Fall Transition

As a person who loves the summer and wearing shorts and flip-flops, I have struggled recently with Colorado’s bout of freezing temps and snowfall. I struggle to pull the pants in my closet out and snuggling in sweaters.

So, I pondered how to be grateful for the change and I came up with a list of what I’m grateful about during autumn:

My husband’s birthday which is October 11th. I have fun making him a yummy, delicious, gluten-free layer cake which we all enjoy eating. His favorite meal is lasagna which I seem to forget in my meal repertoire as we get in and out of winter. So, I have a great time shopping for ingredients and re-learning how to make it and my daughter, husband and I truly enjoy eating it as the temps decrease.

I also love the return of football season and attending Colorado Buffalo Football games. Aside from their recent loss to USC on Saturday, it has been fun seeing the wins in their 5-1 season. Steve Montez has really come a long way since last year and I’m sure the team can bolster themselves against the tougher teams coming up on their schedule.

I remembered today that another thing I love about the cooler temps, is turning on our gas fireplace. It provides us needed warmth and a cozy glow from the flames. My family and I also love candy corns and carving scary pumpkins for Halloween.

As I focus on the things I’m grateful for as the season’s change I begin to soothe myself about the loss of summer and I find peace and joy. I hope you do too.Debie Monax - Author * Speaker